When a boy...

Though I do not agree completely with all the lines below but wanted to share them with you because some of these are beautiful...

When a Boy...

When a Girl...

The War of the Icons

Enjoy the War of the Icons...

Impossible

Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they have been given than to explore the power they have to change it.

Impossible is not a fact, it's an opinion.

It's not a declaration, it's a dare.

Impossible is potential.

Impossible is temporary.

Impossible is nothing.

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I ?
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost, 1920.
Mountain Interval

The Alchemy of woman

The Alchemy of woman as described in the Hindu Mythology :

"He took the lightness of the leaf and the glance of the fawn,
The gaiety of the sun rays and the tears of the mist;
The inconstancy of the wind and the timidity of the hare,
The vanity of the peacock and the softness of the dawn on the throat of the swallow.
He added the harsness of the diamond, and the sweet flavour of honey,
The cruelty of the tiger, the warmth of the fire, and the chill of the snow.
He added the chatter of the jay and cooing of the turtle-dove.
He melted all these and formed a woman.

Then He made a present of her to man."

What we see?

Little Girl with flowers, originally uploaded by Anand Surana.

The eye sees only what the mind is prepared to comprehend.~ Henri Bergson

World Stats

Check out this site which provides a whole lot of interesting stats about -
World Population
US Govt. Spending (I wish someone would provide something similar for India)
Education
Environment
Food
Energy
Health etc..

Life's Little Instructions...Part - I

1. Have a firm handshake.

2. Look people in the eye.

3. Sing in the shower.

4. Own a great stereo system.

5. If in a fight, hit first and hit hard.

6. Keep secrets.

7. Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday.

8. Always accept an outstretched hand.

9. Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.

10. Whistle.

New Orleans vs Mumbai

I couldn't' stop making this comparison..

inches of rain in New Orleans due to hurricane Katrina... 18
inches of rain in Mumbai (July 27th).... 37.1

population of New Orleans... 484,674
population of Mumbai.... 12,622,500

deaths in New Orleans within 48 hours of Katrina...100
deaths in Mumbai within 48hours of rain.. 37.

number of people to be evacuated in New Orleans... entire city..wohh
number of people evacuated in Mumbai...10,000

cases of shooting and violence in New Orleans...Countless
cases of shooting and violence in Mumbai.. NONE

time taken for US army to reach New Orleans... 48 hours
time taken for Indian army and navy to reach Mumbai...12 hours

status 48 hours later...New Orleans is still waiting for relief, army and electricty
status 48 hours later..Mumbai is back on its feet and is business is as usual

USA...world's most developed nation
India...JUST A DEVELOPING NATION..

oops...did i get the last fact wrong??? Or am I just being proud of being an INDIAN?

Google Talk

They say talk is cheap. Google thinks it should be free. Google Talk enables you to call or send instant messages to your friends for free–anytime, anywhere in the world. Google Talk offers you:

Choice: Get in touch how and when you want to–over email, IM or a call

Quality: Talk through your computer but hear your friends as if they were in the same room

Convenience: Your Gmail contacts are pre-loaded into Google Talk so inviting or talking to your friends is just a click away

Google Talk is in beta and requires a Gmail username and password.

Amazing Human Brain

Believe it or not, you can easily read this :

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdgnieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, is taht it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are. The olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?

Things Work Out

Because it rains when we wish it wouldn't,
Because men do what they often shouldn't,
Because crops fail, and plans go wrong-
Some of us grumble all day long.
But somehow, in spite of the care and doubt,
It seems at last that things work out.

Because we lose where we hoped to gain,
Because we suffer a little pain,
Because we must work when we'd like to play-
Some of us whimper along life's way.
But somehow, as day always follows the night,
Most of our troubles work out all right.

Because we cannot forever smile,
Because we must trudge in the dust awhile,
Because we think that the way is long-
Some of us whimper that life's all wrong.
But somehow we live and our sky grows bright,
And everything seems to work out all right.

So bend to your trouble and meet your care,
For the clouds must break, and the sky grow fair.
Let the rain come down, as it must and will,
But keep on working and hoping still.
For in spite of the grumblers who stand about,
Somehow, it seems, all things work out.

By Edgar A. Guest

The Art of Letting Go

Dr. Alan Zimmerman's Comments:
Sooner or later, everyone you know will disappoint you in some way. They'll say something or fail to say something that will hurt you. And they'll do something or fail to do something that will anger you.

It's inevitable.

Unfortunately, you make things worse when you stew over someone's words and deeds. When you dwell on a rude remark or an insensitive action made by another person, you're headed for deeper problems. In fact, the more you dwell on these things, the more bitter you'll get.
You'll find your joy, peace and happiness slipping away. And you'll find your productivity slowing down as you spend more and more time thinking about the slight or telling others about it. Eventually, if you don't stop doing it, you'll even get sick.

So what should you do the next time someone betrays you?

TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR FEELINGS.
Even though the other person may be at fault, even though the other person wronged you, you are still responsible for your own feelings. In other words, other people do not "cause" your feelings. You choose them. For example, two different people could be told that their suggestions made at the staff meeting were "stupid and idiotic." One person may "choose" to feel so hurt that he never speaks up at any other meeting again. The other person may "choose" to feel sorry for the critic, sorry that the critic couldn't see the wisdom and necessity of her suggestions.

As long as you blame other people for your feelings, as long as you believe other people caused your feelings, you're stuck. You're a helpless victim. But if you recognize the fact that you choose your feelings and you are responsible for your feelings, there's hope. You can take some time to think about your feelings. And you can decide what is the best thing to say or do. Then, you've got to learn to WALK AWAY FROM DISAPPOINTMENT. It's difficult to do, but it's possible.

The famous 19th century Scottish historian, Thomas Carlyle, proved that. After working on his multi-volume set of books on "The French Revolution" for six years, Carlyle completed the manuscript and took volume one to his friend John Stuart Mill. He asked Mill to read it.

Five days later, Mill's maid accidentally threw the manuscript into the fire. In agony, Mill went to Carlyle's house to tell him that his work had been destroyed. Carlyle did not flinch. With a smile, he said, "That's all right, Mill. These things happen. It is a part of life. I will start over. I can remember most of it, I am sure. Don't worry. It's all here in my mind. Go,my friend! Do
not feel bad."

As Mill left, Carlyle watched him from the window. Carlyle turned to his wife and said, "I did not want him to see how crushed I am by this misfortune." And with a heavy sigh, he added, "Well the manuscript is gone, so I had better start writing again."

Carlyle finally completed the work, which ranks as one of the great classics of all time. He had learned to walk away from his disappointment. After all, what could Carlyle have done about his burnt manuscript? Nothing. Nothing would have resurrected the manuscript. All Carlyle could do was to get bitter or get started. And what can you do about anything once it is over? Not much. You can try to correct it if it is possible, or you can walk away from it if it isn't. Those are your only two choices. Sometimes you've just got to shake it off and step up.

It's like the farmer who had an old mule who fell into a deep dry well. As he assessed the
situation, he knew it would be difficult, if not impossible, to lift the heavy mule out of the deep well. So the farmer decided to bury the mule in the well. After all, the mule was old and the well was dry, so he could solve two problems at once. He could put the old mule out of his misery and have his well filled.

The farmer asked his neighbours to help him with the shovelling. To work they went. As they threw shovel-full of dirt after shovel-full of dirt on the mule's back, the mule became frightened.
Then all of a sudden an idea came to the mule. Each time they would throw a shovel-full of dirt on his back, he would shake it off and step up. Shovel-full after shovel-full, the mule would shake it off and step up. In not too long a time, the exhausted and dirty mule stepped over the top of the well and through the crowd.

That's the same approach we all need to take. We need to shake it off and step up. Finally, you need to FORGIVE. It's difficult, especially when the other person doesn't deserve your forgiveness or doesn't even seek it. It's difficult when the other person is clearly in the wrong.
Part of the difficulty comes from a common misunderstanding of forgiveness. Forgiveness doesn't mean that the other person's behaviour is okay. And forgiveness doesn't mean that the other person is off the hook. He's still responsible for his misbehaviour. Forgiveness is about letting yourself off the emotional hook. It's about releasing your negative emotions, attitudes, and behaviours. It's about letting go of the past so you can go forward to the future. Everyone in your life, everyone on and off the job is going to disappoint you. If you know how to respond to those situations, you'll be way ahead of most people. You'll be able to live above and beyond your circumstances.

Action: Identify two people that have disappointed, hurt, or angered you. If possible, select two people towards whom you still have some bitterness. Then ask yourself, "How does my bitterness serve me? Am I happier holding on to it? Do I sleep better? Is my life richer, fuller, and better because of my bitterness?"

If you find that your bitterness is hurting you, make a decision. Actually decide to let it go.

Walk away from the disappointment -- which means you no longer dwell on it or talk about it. Period!

Understanding Women (A Man's Perspective)

I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.

A Wife's Revenge

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.

As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.

"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" Iasked.

"No," she replied, "but my husband refused to come shopping with me, soI figured this was the most legal evil thing I could do to him.

Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening

woods, originally uploaded by Anand Surana.

Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening - Robert Frost

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His house is in the village though;
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.

My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

Getting Comfortable with New Technology

Douglas Adams, the creator of all the various manifestations of "The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy" writes the following about growing older; next generation; and about getting comfortable with new technology/inventions etc. He states that -

1) Everything that's already in the world when you're born is just normal;

2) Anything that gets invented between then and before you turn thirty is incredibly exciting and creative and with any luck you can make a career out of it;

3) Anything that gets invented after you're thirty is against the natural order of things and the beginning of the end of civilisation as we know it until it's been around for about ten years when it gradually turns out to be alright really.

Apply this list to movies, rock music, word processors and mobile phones to work out how old you are.

(Click on the title above for further reading.)

Senses Challenge

Put your senses to this test and see how you fare.

Good Luck!

Create your own tune

When the page displays showing 4 dudes press on each separately to hear the lovely music. Press once more to stop it ...

Create your own tune by starting or stopping each of them.

Have fun !!!

Artificial Intelligence

Click on the title above to go to this site. Here first you will be asked to think of something that most people would know about, but, never a specific person, place or thing. For example u may think og mind or emotion.

Once u have thought of something start answering the questions one by one And u will find that if u answer sincerely the AI built into this site will be able to guess quite correctly what u are thinking of.

Go ahead try it - it's fun!

The Differences

A boy asks his father to explain the differences among irritation, aggravation, and frustration.

Dad picks up the phone and dials a number at random.When the phone is answered he asks,

"Can I speak to Mike, please?"

"No! There's no one called Mike here." The person hangs up.

"That's irritation," says Dad.

He picks up the phone again, dials the same number and asks for Mike a second time.

"No, there's no one here called Mike. Go away. Don't call again"

"That's aggravation."

"Then what's 'frustration'?" asks his son.

The father picks up the phone and dials a third time:

"Hello, this is Mike. Have I received any phone calls?"

What's so special about Sept. 1752?

Sept 1752 Calendar, originally uploaded by Anand Surana.

Have you ever seen the calendar for September 1752?

If you are working in Unix, try this out. At $ prompt, type: cal 9 1752

Isn't the output queer? A month with whole of eleven days missing. Well, let me explain.

This was the time England shifted from Roman Julian Calendar to the Gregorian Calendar, and the king of England ordered those 11 days to be wiped off the face of the month of September of 1752. (What couldn't a King do in those days?!) And yes, the workers worked for 11 days less, but got paid for the entire 30 days. And that's how "Paid Leave" was born.

Bless those people.

The Poet And The Scientist

There were once two people travelling on a train, a scientist and a poet, who were riding in the same compartment. They had never met before, so naturally, there wasn't much conversation between the two. The poet was minding his own business, looking out the window at the beauty of the passing terrain. The scientist was very uptight, trying to think of things he didn't know so he could try to figure them out.

Finally, the scientist was so bored, that he said to the poet, "Hey, do you want to play a game?"
The poet, being content with what he was doing, ignored him and continued looking out the window, humming quietly to himself. This infuriated the scientist, who irritably asked again, "Hey, you, do you want to play a game? I'll ask you a question, and if you get it wrong, you give me $5. Then, YOU ask ME a question, and if I can't answer it, I'll give YOU $5."

The poet thought about this for a moment, but he decided against it, seeing that the scientist was obviously a very bright man. He politely turned down the scientist's offer.

The scientist, who, by this time was going mad, tried a final time. "Look, I'll ask you a question, and if you can't answer it, you give me $5. Then you ask ME a question, and if I can't answer it, I'll give you $50!"

Now, the poet was not that smart academically, but he wasn't totally stupid. He readily accepted the offer. "Okay," the scientist said, "what is the EXACT distance between the Earth and the Moon?"

The poet, obviously not knowing the answer, didn't stop to think about the scientist's question. He took a $5 bill out of his pocket and handed it to the scientist. The scientist happily accepted the bill and promptly said, "Okay, now it's your turn."

The poet thought about this for a few minutes, then asked, "All right, what goes up a mountain on three legs, but comes down on four?" The bright glow quickly vanished from the scientist's face. He thought about this for a long time, taking out his notepad and making numerous calculations. He finally gave up on his notepad and took out his laptop, using his Multimedia Encyclopedia.

After about an hour of this, the poet quietly watching the mountains of Colorado go by the whole time, the scientist FINALLY gave up. He reluctantly handed the poet a $50 bill. The poet accepted it graciously, turning back to the window.

"Wait!" the scientist shouted. "You can't do this to me! What's the answer??"

The poet looked at the scientist and calmly put another $5 bill into his hand.

Saying The Right Thing

Martin wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.

Martin looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table. "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love You!"

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table,eating. Martin asks, "Son, what happened last night?"

His son says, "Well, you came home around 3 AM, drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door."

Confused, Martin asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean,and breakfast is on the table waiting for me? I should expect a big quarrel with her!"

His son replies, "Oh, that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your clothes n shoes off, you said, "Lady leave me alone! I'm married!"

Moral
Self-induced hangover -- $100.00
Broken furniture -- $2,000.00
Breakfast -- $10.00
Saying The Right Thing - PRICELESS...

Wisdom tips by Will Rogers

Will Rogers, who died in a plane crash with Wylie Post in 1935, was probably one of the greatest political sages of his time. Below are some all time favourite wisdom tips from him. Enjoy!

1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

3. There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman...neither works.

4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

5. Always drink upstream from the herd.

6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.

8. There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.

9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.

12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him.

The moral : When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

No More Clicks

This site is a unique concept in the world of computing and on the net. The makers of this site feel that there is no need to click the mouse anymore and they go ahead to show how this can be done.

Except for the first page of this site where u click once to enter the site's main attraction, the visitor is not required to click anywhere.
Visit this click-less site and experience it for yourself.

This site has also won the Favourite Website Award.

Proverbs from Around the World - II

A healthy man is a successful man.
French Proverb

A hedge between keeps friendship green.
French Proverb

A hen is heavy when carried far.
Irish Proverb

A hound's food is in its legs.
Irish Proverb

A hungry man is an angry man.
English Proverb

A lie travels round the world while truth is putting her boots on.
French Proverb

A little too late, is much too late.
German Proverb

A lock is better than suspicion.
Irish Proverb

A man does not seek his luck, luck seeks its man.
Turkish Proverb

A man is not honest simply because he never had a chance to steal.
Yiddish Proverb

A man may well bring a horse to the water, but he cannot make him drink.
John Heywood "The Proverbs of John Heywood" (1546)

A man should live if only to satisfy his curiosity.
Yiddish Proverb

A monkey never thinks her baby's ugly.
Haitian Proverb

A new broom sweeps clean, but the old brush knows all the corners.
Irish Proverb

Brain Teasers

Try out these not-so-easy brain teasers.

Click on the link to test your skills.

The Complete Sherlock Holmes

Sherlock Holmes fans can now access the entire collection online at this site.

Happy Reading !

Laws of Nature

 

Plant a kernel of wheat and you reap a pint;
Plant a pint, and you reap a bushel.
Always the law works to give you back more than you give.Anthony Norvell
Author and Astrologer

Proverbs from Around the World - I

A book is like a garden carried in the pocket.
Arab Proverb

A bird in the hand is worth two in a bush.
English Proverb

A broken hand works, but not a broken heart.
Persian Proverb

A cat has nine lives.
Proverb of Unknown Origin

A closed mouth catches no flies.
Italian Proverb

A country can be judged by the quality of its proverbs.
German Proverb

A courtyard common to all will be swept by none.
Chinese Proverb

A dog is wiser than a woman; it does not bark at its master.
Russian Proverb

A drink precedes a story.
Irish Proverb

A drowning man is not troubled by rain.
Persian Proverb

A fool sees not the same tree that a wise man sees.
William Blake "Proverbs of Hell" (1790)

A forest is in an acorn.
Proverb of Unknown Origin

A friend in need is a friend indeed
English Proverb

A friend's eye is a good mirror.
Irish Proverb

A good denial, the best point in law
Irish Proverb

A good husband is healthy and absent.
Japanese Proverb

A hard beginning maketh a good ending.
John Heywood "The Proverbs of John Heywood" (1546)

The game of Cricket

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's in goes out and tries to get out those coming in. Sometimes there are men still in and not out.

There are two men called umpires who stay out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out.

When both sides have been in and out including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!

Simple!

Writing a Tech Spec - remember this...

Think of this next time you are writing a spec.

The US Standard railroad gauge is 4 feet, 8.5 inches.
That's an exceedingly odd number.

Why was that gauge used?
Because that's the way they built them in England, and the US railroads were built by English expatriates.

Why did the English people build them like that?
Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used.

Why did "they" use that gauge then?
Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing.

Okay! Why did the wagons use that odd wheel spacing?
Well, if they tried to use any other spacing the wagons would break on some of the old, long distance roads, because that's the spacing of the old wheel ruts.

So who built these old rutted roads?
The first long distance roads in Europe were built by Imperial Rome for the benefit of their legions. The roads have been used ever since.

And the ruts?
The initial ruts, (which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagons) were first made by Roman war chariots. Since the chariots were made for or by Imperial Rome they were all alike in the matter of wheel spacing.

Thus, we have the answer to the original question. The United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8.5 inches derives from the original specification for an Imperial Roman army war chariot.

Specs and Bureaucracies live forever. So, the next time you are handed a specification and wonder what horse's brain came up with it, you may be exactly right. Because the Imperial Roman chariots were made to be just wide enough to accommodate the back ends of two war horses.

Now the twist to the story....
There's an interesting extension of the story about railroad gauge and horses' behinds. When we see a Space Shuttle sitting on the launch pad, there are two big booster rockets attached to the sides of the main Fuel tank. These are the solid rocket boosters, or SRBs. The SRBs are made by Thiokol at a factory in Utah. The engineers who designed the SRBs might have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRBs had to be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site. The railroad line to the factory runs through a tunnel in the mountains. The SRBs had to fit through that tunnel. The tunnel is slightly wider than a railroad track, and the railroad track is about as wide as two horses' behinds.

So we now see that a major design feature, of what is arguably the world's most advanced transportation system, was determined by the width of a horse!

Update : One of the readers wrote back to inform that like many other spicy stories floating around the net, this one too is just a story and not the truth. Check out the following links for the real story
http://truthorfiction.com/rumors/r/railwidth.htm http://www.snopes.com/history/american/gauge.htm

Many Thanks Rip for the info !

AMERICANISM

U don't open a telephone conversation with a HELLO but with a "Hi"

The telephone is never "engaged", it's always "busy".

U don't "disconnect" a phone, U simply "hang-up".

U never "mess-up" things, U only "screw them up".

U never have a "residence" tel. no., U have a "home" no.

U don't stop at the "signals", but halt at the "lights".

U don't "accelerate", U "step on the gas".

Your tire never "punctures", U may have a "flat".

The trains have "coaches" or "boggies' no more but "carriages" or "boxes".

There R no "petrol pumps", but "gas stations".

U no longer meet a "wonderful" person, U meet a "cool" guy

U don't pull the switch down to light a bulb, rather flick it up.

There's no "Business Area" only "business districts", and no "districts" but "counties".

No one stays "a stone's throw away", might"a few blocks away".

There's no "Town Side", it's "Down Town".

In hotel U no longer ask for "bill" and pay by "cheque", rather ask for "check" and pay with (Dollar) "bill"s.

There R no "soft drinks", only "sodas".

Life's no longer "miserable" it "stinks".

U don't have a "great" time, U have a "ball".

U don't "sweat it out", U "work U'r butt off".

Never "post" a letter, always "mail" it and "glue" the stamps, don't "stick" them.

U no longer live in "flats" or "blocks", find an "apartment".

U don't stand in a "queue", you are in a "line".

U no longer "like" something, U "appreciate" it.

"#" is not "hash", it's "pound".

U R not "deaf", U have "impaired hearing".

U R not "lunatic", U are just "mentally challenged".

U R not "disgusting" U R "sick".

U can't get "surprised" U get "zapped".

U don't "schedule" a meeting, U "skejule" it.

U never "joke", U just "kid".

U never "increase" the pressure, U always "crank" it up.

U never ask for a pencil "rubber" U ask for an eraser. a rubber is a condom

U don't try to find a lift U find an elevator.

U no more ask for a route but for a "RAUT"

U don't ask somebody "How r u ?", U say "What's up dude?"

U never go to see a game U go to watch a game.

If U see "World" champions(or Series),read "USA"champions(or Series).

There's no "zero" but "o", no "Z" but "zee".

There's no FULL STOP after a statement, there's a PERIOD.

If someone gets angry at U, U get "flamed".

You don't say "How do you do", you say "How you doin"

In short U don't speak English, U speak American.

Well u dont' say life is boring u say LIFE SUCKS !!!

Feedback from the Boss

The following feedback was given by a Project Leader about his subordinate -

Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found
hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works independently, without
wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never
thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always
finishes given assignments on time. Often Bob takes extended
measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee
breaks. Bob is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no
vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound
knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Bob can be
classed as a high-calibre employee, the type which cannot be
dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Bob be
promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be
sent away as soon as possible.

SD - Project Leader

The below memo was soon sent following the letter:

That stupid idiot was reading over my shoulder when I wrote the report sent to you earlier today. Kindly read only the odd lines 1, 3, 5, 7, 9, 11, 13 for my true assessment of him.

Regards, SD-Project Leader

The Legend of Marmaris

Once upon a time in Marmaris, somewhere in the southern coast of Turkey, a fisherman and the daughter of a King fell in love. However, like all of us know, the love between a fisherman and a princess simply would not get the blessings of her father. Because of this, they would meet secretly at nights. But the old King soon learnt about his daughter's nocturnal trysts. 

One night, he asked his soldiers to follow her. The soldiers returned and informed the King that every night the princess would leave the palace and go to a small bay out of town. She would signal to the fisherman at the other end of the bay by flashing a light and he would come to that light to find her. 

The King then ordered his soldiers to set a trap. They followed the princess, caught her and flashed a light to entice the fisherman. The princess managed to escape from the soldiers and ran as fast as she could to warn her lover. She realized though that it would not be possible to reach the fisherman if she were to run along the beach, so she thought she would swim. A miracle happened. Wherever she stepped into the sea, the water turned into sand; and the sand turned back into water whenever the soldiers followed her. But, as she was reaching her lover, a soldier's arrow meant for the fisherman struck her, killing her instantly. 

The people of Marmaris say that when the blood of the princess got mixed with the sea water, it changed the color of the sand.

A son's letter

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the center ofthe bed.

It was addressed, "Dad"

With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:

Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I've been finding real passion with Joan and she is so nice-even with all her piercing, tattoos, and her tight Motor cycle clothes. But it's not only the passion dad, she's pregnant and Joan said that we will be very happy.

Even though you won't care for her as she is so much older than I, she already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of fire wood for the whole winter. She wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of my dreams too.

Joan taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and trading it with her friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Joan can get better; she sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your loving son,
John

PS: Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at the neighbor's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card that's in the center drawer of mydesk. I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.

Honouring the Geneva Convention

Saddam Hussein was sitting in his office wondering whom to invade next when his telephone rang.

"Hallo! Mr. Hussein," a heavily accented voice said. "This is Paddy O'Hara up in County Cavan, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!"

"Well, Paddy," Saddam replied, "this is indeed important news! Tell me, how big is your army?"

"At this moment in time," said Paddy after a moment's calculation, "there is myself, my cousin Sean, my next-door neighbour Gerry, and the entire dominoes team from the pub -- that makes eight!"

Saddam sighed. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have a million men in my army waiting to move on my command."

"Begorrah!" said Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back!"

Sure enough, the next day Paddy rang back. "Right, Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be, Paddy?" Saddam asked.

"Well, we have two combine harvesters, a bulldozer and Murphy's tractor from the farm."

Once more Saddam sighed. "I must tell you, Paddy that I have sixteen thousand tanks, fourteen thousand armoured personnel carriers, and my army has increased to two million men since we last spoke."

"Bloody hell!" said Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back!"

Sure enough, Paddy called again the next day. "Right, Mr. Hussein, I am sorry to tell you that we have had to call off the war."

"I'm sorry to hear that," said Saddam. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Well," said Paddy, "We've had a look at the Geneva Convention, all had a chat, and there's no way we can feed two million prisoners."

Complete this picture

Looks like some one ripped this picture apart and threw the pieces. Why don't you try your hand at this one and join the pieces to make the complete picture.

Click on the title above to try.

Some funny Airline Announcements

# Lufthansa Airlines

Passengers on a Lufthansa flight heard this announcement from the captain :"Ladies and Gentlemen, I am sorry to inform you that we have lost power to all of our engines and will shortly crash into the ocean".

The passengers were obviously very worried about this situation but were somewhat comforted by the captain's next announcement.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we at Lufthansa have prepared for such an emergency and we would now like you to rearrange your seating so that all the non-swimmers are on the left side of the plane and all the swimmers are on the right side of the plane after this announcement all the passengers rearranged their seating to comply with the captain's request.

Two minutes later the captain made a belly landing in the ocean. The captain once again made an announcement:"Ladies and Gentlemen we have crashed into the ocean. All of the swimmers on the right side of the plane, open your emergency exits and quickly swim away from the plane.

For all of the non-swimmers on the left side of plane... -Thank You For Flying Lufthansa- ".


# British Airways

"This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic."

"If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire.

"If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that the port wing has fallen off."

"If you look down towards the Atlantic ocean, you will see a little yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you. That's me your captain, the co-pilot, and one of the air stewardesses. This is a recorded message."

# Delta Airlines

At the airport for a trip, I settled down to wait for the boarding announcement at Gate 35. Then I heard the voice on the public address system saying, "We apologize for the inconvenience, but Delta Flight 570 will board from Gate 41.

"So my family picked up our luggage and carried it over to Gate 41.

Not ten minutes later the public address voice told us that Flight 570 would in fact be boarding from Gate 35. So again we gathered our carry-on luggage and returned to the original gate.

Just as we were settling down, the public address voice spoke " Thank you for participating in Delta's physical fitness program."

Test your mental health

During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the Director what is the criteria that defines a patient to be institutionalized.

Well," said the Director, "we fill up a bathtub, we offer a teaspoon, a teacup, and a bucket to the patient and ask the patient to empty the bathtub."

1. Would you use the spoon?

2. Would you use the teacup?

3. Would you use the bucket?

..Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would choose thebucket as it is larger than the spoon."

No," answered the Director. "A normal person would pull the plug."

The Myth about Error 404

The following story is doing the rounds of the web providing explanation as to why the error code for “File not found” is 404 and not anything else.

Why "404 - Page Not Found" ? - Why not "808 - Page Not Found" ?

The history of 404 : Before the beginning of time, when the Internet was still very much under the spell of bare Unix shells and Gopher, before SLIP or PPP became widely used, an ambitious group of young scientists at CERN (Switzerland) started working on what was to become the media revolution of the nineties: the World Wide Web, later to be known as WWW, or simply 'the Web'. Their aim : to create a database infrastructure that offered open access to data in various formats: multi-media. The ultimate goal was clearly to create a protocol that would combine text and pictures and present it as one document, and allow linking to other such documents: hypertext. Because these bright young minds were reluctant to reveal their progress (and setbacks) to the world, they started developing their protocol in a closed environment : CERN's internal network. Many hours were spend on what later became the world-wide standard for multimedia documents. Using the physical lay-out of CERN's network and buildings as a metaphor for the 'real world' they situated different functions of the protocol in different offices within CERN.

In an office on the fourth floor (room 404), they placed the World Wide Web's central database: any request for a file was routed to that office, where two or three people would manually locate the requested files and transfer them, over the network, to the person who made that request. When the database started to grow, and the people at CERN realized that they were able to retrieve documents other than their own research-papers, not only the number of requests grew, but also the number of requests that could not be fulfilled, usually because the person who requested a file typed in the wrong name for that file. Soon these faulty requests were answered with a standard message : Room 404: file not found".

Later, when these processes were automated and people could directly query the database, the messageID's for error messages remained linked to the physical location the process took place: "404: file not found".The room numbers remained in the error codes in the official release of HTTP (Hyper Text Transfer Protocol) when the Web left CERN to conquer the world, and are still displayed when a browser makes a faulty request to a Web server.

In memory of the heroic boys and girls that worked deep into the night for all those months, in those small and hot offices at CERN, Room 404 is preserved as a 'place on the Web'. None of the other rooms are still used for the Web. Room 404 is the only and true monument to the beginning of the Web, a tribute to a place in the past, where the future was shaped.

But it seems that this is just a made up story - a Myth. The 404 Research lab claims that –

"Having visited CERN myself, I can tell you that Room 404 is not on the fourth floor - the CERN office numbering system doesn't work like that - the first digit usually refers to the *building* number (ie. building 4), and the second two to the office number. But, strangely, there is no room "04" in building "4", the offices start at "410" and work upwards - don't ask me why. Sorry to disappoint you all, but there is no Room 404 in CERN - it simply doesn't exist, and certainly hasn't been preserved as "the place where the web began". In fact, there *is* a display about this, including a model of the first NeXT server, but the whole "Room 404" thing is just a myth."

This site links to a site Room 404 which I could not access because true to its name it gave me an Error 404. There is lot of such juicy stuff floating around on the web, which is nothing but misinformation. It is advisable to take such stories with a pinch of salt instead of accepting them on face value.

If possible, the best approach would be to go one step further and do a bit of research on it yourself. While you are on the net, it will just take a few minutes to actually carry out a few searches on Google and Answers.com and find out the truth. Otherwise you run the risk of being fed with lot of misinformation.

How to cross the bridge?

Question :
U2 has a concert that starts in just 17 minutes and all of the band members must all cross a bridge to get there. The four men begin on the same side of the bridge and you must help them to get across to the other side. Due the age of the bridge, only two people can cross at one time. To make matters worse, it is night-time and there is only one torch. The torch is always required when crossing the bridge and the torch must be walked back and forth, it cannot be thrown, etc. Each band member walks at a different speed and a pair must walk together at the rate of the slower man:

Bono takes 1 minute to cross
Edge takes 2 minutes to cross
Adam takes 5 minutes to cross
Larry takes 10 minutes to cross

For example, if Bono and Larry walk across first, it takes them 10 minutes to cross. If Adam then returns with the torch , a total of 15 minutes will have passed.

There is no trick behind this, it is the simple movement of resources in the appropriate order.

Solution :

Bono and Edge crosses the bridge… 2 mins
Bono comes back 1 min
Adam and Larry crosses 10 mins
Edge comes back 2 mins (this is the tricky one)
Edge and bono crosses 2 mins
=============
Total 17 mins
=============

Pineapple Six Phase Project Progression Law

1. Enthusiasm

2. Disillusionment

3. Panic and Hysteria

4. Search for the guilty

5. Punishment of the innocent

6. Praise and honors for the non-participants

Children's letters to God

These are actual letters that kids have written to God. This exercise was done in a Sunday School class and were too cute to miss. Here they are...

# Dear God... Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don't you just keep the ones you have now?

# Dear God... Who draws the lines around the countries?

# Dear God... I went to this wedding and they kissed right in church. Is that okay?

# Dear God... Thank you for my baby brother, but what I prayed for was a puppy.

# Dear God... It rained for our whole vacation and is my father mad! He said some things about you that people are not supposed to say, but hope you will not hurt him anyway.

# Dear God... Please send me a pony. I never asked for anything before. You can look it up.

# Dear God... If we come back as something, please don't let me be Jennifer because I hate her.

# Dear God... I want to be just like my daddy when I get big, but not with so much hair all over.

# Dear God... I think about you sometimes, even when I'm not praying!

# Dear God... I bet it is very hard for you to love all the people in the world. There are only four people in our family and I can never do it.

# Dear God... Of all the people who worked for you, I like Noah and David the best.

# Dear God... If you watch me in church Sunday, I'll show you my new shoes.

# Dear God... I do not think anybody could be a better God. Well, I just want you to know that I am not just saying this because you are God already.

# Dear God...! I didn't think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset you made on Tuesday. That was cool!

We Didn't Start The Fire

Listen to the song "We Didn't Start The Fire". As the song progresses more than a hundred pictures flash on your screen one by one with the flow of the song. Great work.

Click on the title to hear the song and see the snaps.

Enjoy!

Unknown History of Words

Here is the history of some of the words we commonly use but never ponder how they evolved to their present form.

MOPED is the short term for 'Motorized Pedaling'.

POP MUSIC is 'Popular Music' shortened.

BUS is the short term for 'Omnibus' that means everybody.

FORTNIGHT comes from 'Fourteen Nights' (Two Weeks).

DRAWING ROOM was actually a 'withdrawing room' where people withdrew after Dinner. Later the prefix 'with' was dropped.

NEWS refers to information from Four directions N, E, W and S.

AG-MARK, which some products bear, stems from 'Agricultural Marketing'.

JOURNAL is a diary that tells about 'Journey for a day' during each Day's business.

QUEUE comes from 'Queen's Quest'. Long back a long row of people as waiting to see the Queen. Someone made the comment Queen's Quest.

TIPS come from 'To Insure Prompt Service'. In olden days to get Prompt service from servants in an inn, travelers used to drop coins in a Box on which was written 'To Insure Prompt Service'. This gave rise to the custom of Tips.

JEEP is a vehicle with unique Gear system. It was invented during WorldWar II (1939-1945). It was named 'General Purpose Vehicle (GP)'. GP was changed into JEEP later.

Be Practical

[1] Jone's Motto:
Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.

[2] Terman's Law of Innovation:
If you want a team to win the high jump, you find one person who can jump seven feet, not seven people who can jump one foot each.

[3] O'brien's Variation:
If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

[4] Conway's Law:
In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person must be fired.

[5] The Peter Principle:
In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of Incompetence. Work is accomplished by those employees who have not reached their level of incompetence.

[6] H.L.Mencken's Law:
Those who can, do. Those who cannot, teach.

[7] Martin's Extension:
Those who can't teach, administer

[8] Belani's Extrapolation:
Those who cannot even administer, become consultants.

[9] Lieberman's Law:
Everbody lies; but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.

[10] Kovac's Conundrum:
When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.

[11] Van Herpen's Law:
The solving of the problem lies in finding the solvers.

[12] Murphy's Law of Government:
If anything can go wrong, it will do so in triplicate.

[13] Bell's Theorem:
When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.

[14] Ruby's Principle of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with Someone you don't want to be seen with.

[15] Young's Law:
Great discoveries are made by mistake.

[16] Kin Hubbard:
A good listener is usually thinking about something else.

Cost of War

The Cost of War counter indicates the magnitude of cost of the Iraq War to U.S. taxpayers. It shows the amount appropriated by Congress spread out over time. It does not indicate the actual outlays or obligations as they are incurred.

The Cost of War calculator is set to reach $207.5 billion at the end of fiscal year 2005 (September 30, 2005). The Cost of War calculator is occasionally reset based on new information and new allocations of funding.

The site also gives comparative figures for how the same amount of money could have made a difference to Kid's Health or World Hunger or college Scholarships etc.

Click on the title to see the counter and more details.

Advertising - 3M style

3mmoneyglass
Originally uploaded by Anand Surana.

3M the company that makes post-it notes also make a whole load of other products.

In a recent marketing campaign in Vancouver they sought a strong
image for their security glass.

They modified a bus shelter and fitted their security glass and filled it with real bank notes !!

Many have tried to gain access with golf clubs and baseball bats but obviously the glass remains intact !

From time to time a local TV station intends to show videos of those trying to get at the cash!!

New Looks

As you might have noticed that I have changed the template of this blog (Thank God at you noticed it now...now stop wondering what it looked like earlier).

Anyways, I hope you will find it pleasant and more readable (assuming you have been here earlier). So why did I change the look/template/background afterall? No, no, there was absolutely no problem with the earlier one. It looked good but then I thought this would be better for the following reasons -

• This one doesn't strain your eyes (so u can read more without your eyes getting tired)
• This one doesn't look like my Mainframe Screen (the previous template with the black background and white text was more like it)
• Looks more readable (more soothing colours)
• Just wanted a change (Change is the only thing which is constant in this world)

Okay, I won't bore you any more with reasons for why I changed the look and feel of this blog. Go ahead and enjoy reading.

Exploring the Deepest Cave

Deepest Cave @ National Geographic Magazine

An international team of explorers broke the caving depth record and reached a depth of 6824 feet (2080 meteres) setting a new world record.

Checkout this link for details and pics of the expedition.

Thanks for the best laugh...

On a recent weekend in Atlantic City, a woman won a bucketful of quarters at a slot machine. She took a break from the slots for dinner with her husband in the hotel dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters in her room. "I'll be right back and we'll go to eat," she told her husband and carried the coin-laden bucket to the elevator. As she was about to walk into the elevator she noticed two men already aboard.

Both were black. One of them was tall...very tall...an intimidating figure. The woman froze.

Her first thought was: These two are going to rob me.

Her next thought was: Don't be a bigot, they look like perfectly nice gentlemen, but racial stereotypes are powerful, and fear immobilized her.

She stood and stared at the two men. She felt anxious, flustered and ashamed. She hoped they didn't read her mind but, gosh, they had to know what she was thinking!!! Her hesitation about joining them in the elevator was all too obvious now. Her face was flushed. She couldn't just stand there, so with a mighty effort of will she picked up one foot and stepped forward and followed with the other foot and was on the elevator. Avoiding eye contact, she turned around stiffly and faced the elevator doors as they closed. A second passed, and the another second, and then another. Her fear increased! The elevator didn't move.

Panic consumed her. My God, she thought, I'm trapped and about to be robbed! Her heart plummeted. Perspiration poured from every pore. Then one of the men said, "Hit the floor." Instinct told her to do what they told her. The bucket of quarters flew upwards as she threw out her arms and collapsed on the elevator floor. A shower of coins rained down on her. Take my money and spare me, she prayed.

More seconds passed. She heard one of the men say politely, "Ma'am, if you'll just tell us what floor you're going to, we'll push the button." The one who said it had a little trouble getting the words out. He Was trying mightily to hold in a belly laugh. The woman lifted her head and looked up at the two men. They reached down to help her up. Confused, she struggled to her feet. "When I told my friend here to hit the floor," said the average sized one, "I meant that he should hit the elevator button for our floor. I didn't mean for you to hit the floor, ma'am." He spoke genially. He bit his lip. It was obvious he was having a hard time not laughing.

The woman thought: My God, what a spectacle I've made of myself. She was too humiliated to speak. She wanted to blurt out an apology, but words failed her. How do you apologize to two perfectly respectable gentlemen for behaving as though they were going to rob you? She didn't know what to say. The three of them gathered up the strewn quarters and refilled her bucket. When the elevator arrived at her floor they then insisted on walking her to her room. She seemed a little unsteady on her feet, and they were afraid she might not make it down the corridor. At her door they bid her a good evening.

As she slipped into her room she could hear them roaring with laughter as they walked back to the elevator. The woman brushed herself off. She pulled herself together and went downstairs for dinner with her husband.

The next morning flowers were delivered to her room - a dozen roses. Attached to EACH rose was a crisp one hundred dollar bill.
The cardsaid:
"Thanks for the best laugh we've had in years."

It was signed;
Eddie Murphy
Michael Jordan

NaDa does nothing for everybody

::: NaDa :::: "NaDa� is a new concept. A thought, really. It is very light : 1 byte. It doesn't take long to fetch. It doesn't take long to understand. It doesn't disturb your habits nor does it makes you feel insecure. It is a reassuring piece of software that does nothing, and does it very well. That's a lot ! "

To read more about this click on the title above.

God's Cake

God's Cake
Originally uploaded by Anand Surana.

Sometimes we wonder, "What did I do to deserve this?" or "Why did God have to do this to me?" Here is a wonderful explanation! A daughter is telling her Mother how everything is going wrong, she's failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away.

Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, "Absolutely Mom, I love your cake."

"Here, have some cooking oil," her Mother offers. "Yuck" says her daughter.

"How about a couple raw eggs?" "Gross, Mom!"

"Would you like some flour then? Or maybe baking soda?" "Mom, those are all yucky!"

To which the mother replies: "Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake!

God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But God knows that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good! We just have to trust Him and, eventually, they will all make something wonderful!

God is crazy about you. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning.

Whenever you want to talk, He'll listen. He can live anywhere in the universe, and He chose your heart.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.

That's Life...

Cup
Originally uploaded by Anand Surana.

Life is like having a cup of tea.
You sit by the side of the window, lift the cup and take a careless sip,
Only to realize, somebody forgot to put the sugar.

Too lazy to go for it you somehow struggle through the sugarless cup.
Until you discover undissolved sugar crystal sitting at the bottom...

THAT'S LIFE !!!

The 90/10 Principle

Author : Stephen Covey

Discover the 90/10 Principle, It will change your life (at least the way you react to situations).

What is this principle?
10% of life is made up of what happens to you.
90% of life is decided by how you react.

What does this mean?
We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us.
We cannot stop the car from breaking down.
The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off.
A driver may cut us off in traffic.

We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%.

How?
By your reaction.
You cannot control a red light, but you can control your reaction.
Don't let people fool you; YOU can control how you react.

Let's use an example. You are eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what just what happened. What happens when the next will be determined by how you react.

You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over. She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt.

Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work. You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school.

Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit. After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse.

You look forward to coming home, When you arrive home, you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter. Why?

Because of how you reacted in the morning. Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?

The answer is D.

You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day.

Here is what could have and should have happened. Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say, "It's ok honey, you just need, to be more careful next time".

Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good the day you are having.

Notice the difference? Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different. Why? Because of how you REACTED. You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% was determined by your reaction.

Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 principle.
If someone says something negative about you, don't be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You don't have to let the negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out etc.

How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic? Do you lose your temper? Pound on the steering wheel? A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off) Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do you try and bump them? WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at work? Why let the cars ruin your drive? Remember the 90/10 principle, and do not worry about it.

You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep and get irritated? It will work out. Use your worrying energy and time into finding another job. The plane is late; it is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger. Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse. Now you know the 90-10 principle. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results. You will lose nothing if you try it.

The 90-10 principle is incredible. Very few know and apply this principle. The result? Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and heartache. There never seem to be a success in life. Bad days follow bad days. Terrible things seem to be constantly happening. There is constant stress, lack of joy, and broken relationships. Worry consumes time. Anger breaks friendships and life seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest. Friends are lost. Life is a bore and often seems cruel. Does this describe you? If so, do not be discouraged.
You can be different! Understand and apply the 90/10 principle.

It will change your life.

How to Stay Young

# Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height.
Let the doctor worry about them. That is why you pay him/her.

# Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

# Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. "An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

# Enjoy the simple things.

# Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

# The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves.

# Be ALIVE while you are alive.

# Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

# Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

# Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.

# Tell the people you love that you love them. And tell it to them at every opportunity.

and always remember that -

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away.

Believe while others

Believe while others …. By William Arthur Ward

Believe while others are doubting.

Plan while others are playing.

Study while others are sleeping.

Decide while others are delaying.

Prepare while others are daydreaming.

Begin while others are procrastinating.

Work while others are wishing.

Save while others are wasting.

Listen while others are talking.

Smile while others are frowning.

Commend while others are criticizing.

Persist while others are quitting.

The Perfume

As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of the school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers she looked at her students and said she loved them all the same. However that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in the seat was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.

Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he did not play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy, and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant.

It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers. At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each student past records and she put Teddy's off until the last. However when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise.

Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners. He is a joy to be around."

His second grade teacher wrote Teddy is an excellent student, well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."

His third grade teacher wrote, "Teddy's mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps are not taken."

His fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he sometimes sleeps in class."

By now Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped beautifully in bright ribbons and paper, except for Teddy's, whose present was clumsy and wrapped in heavy brown paper, the he would have got from a grocery bag. Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents.

Some of the children started to laugh when she found the rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing and a bottle of perfume that was only one quarter full. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed on after school that day just long to say, " Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my mom used to." After the children left, she cried for at long time.

On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing, and arithmetic. Instead she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in class. And, despite her lie that she loved all the children the same, Teddy became one of her "pets".

A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling her that she was still the best teacher he had ever had in his life.

Six years went by before she got another letter from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in is whole life.

Four years after that she received another note saying that while things had been tough at times, he still stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate with the highest honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and most favorite teacher he ever had in his whole life.

Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and most favourite teacher he ever had in his whole life. But now the name was little longer ... the letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, MD.

The story does not end here. There was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said the he met this girl who was going to marry.

He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson would agree to sit at the wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom.

Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what, she wore that bracelet- the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she also remembered to wear the perfume that Teddy's mother wore on the last Christmas they spent together.

They hugged each other, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference."

Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach till I met you."You could have a Teddy standing in front of you and yet not realize it . . .

Create meaning in life

spider web
Originally uploaded by Anand Surana.

You will find meaning in life only if you create it.
It is not lying there somewhere behind the bushes,
so you can go and you search a little bit and find it.
It is not there like a rock that you will find.
It is a poetry to be composed,
it is a song to be sung,
it is a dance to be danced.

Appraisal vs Resignation

In Appraisal meeting they will speak only about your weakness, errors, failures.
In resignation meeting they will speak only about your strength, achievements, success.

In Appraisal you may need to cry and beg for even 10% hike.
In resignation you can demand for more than 60-70% hike.

During Appraisal, they will deny promotion saying you didn't meet the expectation, you don't have leadership qualities.
During resignation, they will say you are the core member of team, you have to take the project in shoulder and lead to success.

There is 90% chance for not getting incentives after appraisal.
There is 90% chance of getting on-site opportunity after resignation.

Now something for those who have resigned or are going to resign :
Don't think that your new company appreciates your talent and welcomes you with red carpet; the truth is that they are badly in need of resources.

Don't assume that there won't be politics, appraisal glitches in the new company.
"IT'S A DIFFERENT PLATE BUT SAME FOOD"

Playing Chess against the computer

This is how a computer thinks when you play chess against it. It's just awesome!! (Click on the title above). See the innumerable number of calculations that it makes.

After seeing this you'll probably never regret losing against a machine!!

Shaheed Bhagat Singh

The text of the various letters that Shaheed Bhagat Singh wrote during the struggle for independence to his friends, and the pamphlets that he circulated can be found here.
(Click on the title above.)

Office Buzz Words

Office Buzz Words and Phrases for the 21st Century

BLAMESTORMING - Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or aproject failed, and who was responsible.

SEAGULL MANAGER - A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.

CHAINSAW CONSULTANT - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands.

CUBE FARM - An office filled with cubicles.

MOUSE POTATO - The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.

PRAIRIE DOGGING - When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.

SITCOMs - (Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage) What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids.

STARTER MARRIAGE - A short-lived first marri age that ends in divorce with no kids, no property and no regrets.

STRESS PUPPY - A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.

SWIPED OUT - An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.

TOURISTS - People who take training classes just to get a vacation from their jobs. "We had three serious students in the class; the rest were just tourists."

TREEWARE - Hacker slang for documentation or other printed material.

XEROX SUBSIDY - Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.

CHIPS & SALSA - Chips = hardware, Salsa = software. "Well, first we gotta figure out if the problem's in your chips or your salsa."

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE - The fine art of whacking the heck out of an electronic device to get it to work again. (Try not to dent the case.)

SALMON DAY - The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end.

CLM (Career Limiting Move) - Used among microserfs to describe ill- advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM.

ADMINISPHERE - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve.

DILBERTED - To be exploited and oppressed by your boss. Derived from the experiences of Dilbert, the geek-in-hell comic strip character. "I've been Dilberted again. The old man revised the specs for the fourth time this week."

404 - Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. "Don't bother asking him ... he's 404, man."

Dumb Kid

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."

The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?"

The boy takes the quarters and leaves.

"What did I tell you?" said the barber.

"That kid never learns!"

Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"

The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"

Jai Maharashtra

4 Mumbaites - a Gujju, a Bhaiyya and a Bihari & Malayali died and were facing Yama. Yama asked them if they wanted some facilities & told Chitragupt decided on their accommodation.

The Gujju said : "Hey Yambhai, aa marathi loko toh mane shaanti thi jeeva nathi deta. Maari dukaan fodi naakhi. Aa marathi loko ekdum jungle chhe. Mane maari baaju maa marathi maanas nathi joto."

The UPite (Bhaiyya) said : "Theek kaha gujjubhai ne. Shriman Yam, in marathi logo ne to hamara jeena hi mushkil kar diya hai....eemaan se! Arre, meri dukaan ka board bhi kala kar diya. Kahat rahi ki dukaan ka naam marathi bhasha mein hona chaahiye. Ab ee bhi koi baat hui kya? Mujhe bhi mere baaju mein marathi aadmi nahi chaahiye."

The Bihari said : "Yeh dono sajjan aadmi theek kahat hain. Arre main thode din pehle railway ki pariksa dene mumbai gaya tha. Raam Lalla ki sougandh, in marathi logun ne humka bahut hi peeta. Hamaar haddi pasli ek kardi. Aisa junglee marathi humka hamaar saath naahi chaahiye."

The Malayali said: "aiiyoo humoko bhi marathi baaju main nahi mangta, bahto pareshaan karta hai yeh log. kuch kaam kerne ko nahi aata phir bhi hosiyari maarke kaheta hai ki tumko hamare mumbai se nikal dega.

Yama turns to Chitragupt : "Aayla Chitrya, ya saglyanchya files majhyakade gheun ye re!!! Baghto ekekala"

The best computer teacher

Mother taught the IF ... THEN .... ELSE structure:
"If it's snowing, then put your boots on before you go to school; otherwise just wear your shoes."

Mother explained the difference between batch and transaction processing:
"We'll wash the white clothes when we get enough of them to make a load, but we'll wash these socks out right now by hand because you'll need them this afternoon."

Mother taught me about linked lists.
Once, for a birthday party, she laid out a treasure hunt of ten hidden clues, with each clue telling where to find the next one, and the last one leading to the treasure. She then gave us the first clue.

Mother understood about parity errors.
When she counted socks after doing the laundry, she expected to find an even number and groaned when only one sock of a pair emerged from the washing machine. Later she applied the principles of redundancy engineering to this problem by buying our socks three identical pairs at a time. This greatly increased the odds of being able to come up with at least one matching pair.

Mother had all of us children write our Christmas thank you notes to Grandmother, one after another, on a single large sheet of paper which was then mailed in a single envelope with a single stamp. This was obviously an instance of blocking records in order to save money by reducing the number of physical I/O operations.

Mother used flags to help her manage the housework. Whenever she turned on the stove, she put a potholder on top of her purse to remind herself to turn it off again before leaving the house.

Mother knew about devices which raise an interrupt signal to be serviced when they have completed any operation. She had a whistling tea kettle.

Mother understood about LIFO (Last In First Out) ordering. In my lunch bag she put the dessert on the bottom, the sandwich in the middle, and the napkin on top so that things would come out in the right order at lunchtime.

There is an old story that God knew He couldn't be physically present everywhere at once, to show His love for His people, and so He created mothers. That is the difference between centralized and distributed processing.

As any kid who's ever misbehaved at a neighbor's house finds out, all the mothers in the neighborhood talk to each other. That's a local area network of distributed processors that can't be beat.

So, lets say... Mom, you're the best computer teacher I ever had.

Keeping Women Happy

In the world of romance, one single rule applies to the men: Make thewoman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do somethingshe dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points fordoing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.

Here is a guide to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES

You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)
You go out to buy her what she wants (+5)
In the rain (+8)
But return with Beer (-5)
You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)
You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)
You pummel it with iron rod (+10)
It's her pet (-10)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS

You stay by her side the entire party (0)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a collegebuddy (-2)
Named Tina (-4)
Tina is a dancer (-6)
Tina has silicon implants (-80)

HER BIRTHDAY

You take her out to dinner (0)
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)
Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)
And it's all-you-can-eat night (-3)
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is paintedthe colours of your favourite team (-10)

A NIGHT OUT

You take her to a movie (+2)
You take her to a movie she likes (+4)
You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
You take her to a movie you like (-2)
It's called 'DeathCop' (-3)
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)

YOUR PHYSIQUE

You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggyHawaiian shirts (-30)
You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-8000)

ENJOY THE 'BIG' QUESTION

She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) [Yes, you LOSE points no matter WHAT]
You hesitate in responding (-10)
You reply, "Where?" (-35)
Any otherresponse (-20)

COMMUNICATION

When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying whatlooks like a concerned expression (0)
You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)
She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-10000)

Mein lafzoon mein kuch bhi izhar nahi karta

Arz kiya hai...

Mein lafzoon mein kuch bhi izhar nahi karta
Iska matlab ye nahi ke mein tujhe pyar nahi karta..

Chahta hoon mein tujhe ajj bhi magar
Teri sauch mein apna waqat bekar nahi karta..

Tamasha na ban jaye kahin mohabbat meri
Isliye apne dard ko namudaar nahi karta..

Jo kuch mila hai usi mein kush hoon mein
Tere liye Khuda se takrar nahi karta..

Per kuch to baat hai teri fitrat mein zalim
Warna mein tujhe chahnay ki khata bar bar na karta..

Per kuch to baat hai teri fitrat mein zalim
Warna mein tujhe chahnay ki khata bar bar na karta..

Dating

Grandpa and Grandma always got very excited when they recalled the old days they were together. They made a decision, one day to make it "yesterday once more". They made a date on the river bank they used to go when they were young.

The next day, Grandpa got up at 6 a.m. in the morning, dashed to the bank, picked up a big bunch of wild flowers before sunrise, waited there for his sweetheart to come. But Grandpa ended up being disappointed as Grandma never showed up even after sunset.

Grandpa went home in such an anger. He opened the door and saw Grandma lying on the sofa with her pillow. He threw the flowers on the floor and questioned: "Why didn't you come to our date?!!"

Grandma hid her head in the pillow and replied shyly: "Mom didn't allow me to go..."

Leroy

A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 kids...
"WOW," the social worker exclaims, "are they ALL YOURS???"
"Yep they are all mine," the flustered momma sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. She says, "Sit down Leroy." All the children rush to find seats.
"Well," says the social worker, "then you must be here to sign up. I'll need all your children's names."
"This one's my oldest - he is Leroy."
"OK, and who's next?"
"Well, this one he is Leroy, also."

The social worker raises an eyebrow but continues. One by one, through the oldest four, all boys, all named Leroy. Then she is introduced to the eldest girl, named Leighroy!

"All right," says the caseworker. "I'm seeing a pattern here. Are they ALL named Leroy?"

Their Momma replied, "Well, yes-it makes it easier.
When it is time to get them out of bed and ready for school, I yell, 'Leroy!'
An' when it's time for dinner, I just yell 'Leroy!' an' they all come running.'
An 'if I need to stop the kid who's running into the street, I just yell 'Leroy' and all of them stop.
It's the smartest idea I ever had, naming' them all Leroy."

The social worker thinks this over for a bit, then wrinkles her forehead and says tentatively,
"But what if you just want ONE kid to come, and not the whole bunch?"

"I call them by their last names."

Good News India

Every man has a view of his land and his people. This is mine. Of India -- D V Sridharan

This is how the page begins and what follows is immensely engrossing….if u haven’t been to this page before it’s a must read. If u have been there then u already know.
Click here to read further.